the comedown: why am I alive?

You told me having a job would bring me so much. The same much as the much I give a fuck about what it brings me... Money.
I was promised it would bring me happiness. You seemed so convinced, that I even started believing it myself. What can I buy with that, that provides happiness?
You know how much I care about what I earn? None. It can't buy love...
I want to feel, just to feel real...
I've already been stripped from everything. I'm tired of covering myself up...
My eyes are crawling with fear. And I don't know where to look...
Please, just save me from this darkness...

I am currently rinsed with thoughts, my mind has become dried up, thirsting for new ideas. But truthfully, I am truly exhausted. I hope in the future we will have a blog together... but for now, I honestly have nothing to contribute.
The only thing I can think about is her... Or should I use that as an excuse to be used?

"Say how much you love me, I'm an alienated puppy. I fear you. I fear you...
Tell me this is phony, and I'll go back to being lonely. I fear you. I fear you..."

~JapanIsSega~